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Demandingness

Posted on July 24, 2023 by Pam

Another new word but when I read it I know exactly what it means. I, too, insist upon attention, help, or advice from others. Some days I would rather give out a lot of advice to a lot of people! I think my ideas are better than theirs. We want what we want. This demandingness is sometimes associated with depression. Mike Mason uses the term in his very excellent book, ‘Practicing the Presence of People’.

I admire a two-year-old who can throw a tantrum with purpose. There is an object of their affection and they won’t take no for an answer. Now – not later. This term also conjures up a picture of that driver we all despise who cuts in front because their destination is more urgent than yours. We want what we want so how do we tame this beast – this carnality? Moderation in all things? Maybe a better idea is in Jesus Sermon on the Mount in Chapter 7 of Matthew. In five chapters later Jesus sends them out two by two so they must have been quick learners.

Matt 7:12, “Therefore whatever you want others to do for you, do so for them; for this is the Law and the Prophets.” This is a good start. Thinking of others tames demandingness.

Matt 7:24-25, “Therefore, every one who hears these words of Mine, and acts upon them, may be compared to a wise man, who built his house upon the rock; and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and burst against that house; and yet it did not fall; for it had been founded upon the rock.” Be convinced that the thing we are demanding is based on good theology and the care of others.

Matt 7:13, “Enter by the narrow gate; for the gate is wide, and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and many are those who enter by it.” When we insist on our own way make sure we demand the narrow gate which will be the harder thing. These days there is much in the world that demands a big fat NO.

And one more, Matt 7:17, “Even so every good tree bears good fruit; but the rotten tree bears bad fruit.” Demand good things. Surround ourselves with people we admire so we can model their care of others. Look for the good fruit and duplicate. Demandingness can make us better able to show God’s love.

"Thoughts from a genuinely evaluative mind."

Pam writes so that must make her a writer. Recently retired, she can now fill days with family, friends, missions, writing, creating, and showing up for whomever needs her. Pam loves the Lord and people. The Bible is God’s love letter to us (and who does not need more love) so she studies and writes some more.

Pam lives in the Pacific Northwest but was home-grown in Southern California. She attended San Jose Bible College and finished a Bachelor of Science degree in Biochemistry at UCLA. She became a teacher, then a Research and Development Chemist, then she built two successful real estate businesses in two states. Pam also pursued study at Fuller Theological Seminary and just completed six months serving in missions abroad.

Pam has two amazing children, married to two precious in-laws, and five sweet grandchildren. Pam is a gifted connector and communicator and the Northwest has the perfect climate for staying inside and writing – or baking! She has been writing since a wee one and is currently converting many years of blogging, by topic, into ten books. The first is a collection from 2011 titled, Beautiful Enough. The second is a yearly day-timer titled, Weekly Planner - Lessons in Life, Glory, and Grace. Number three is in progress with the working title, Christmas Today.

Ten facts about Pam in no particular order:

  1. On the team that developed an insulation for the Alaskan oil pipeline.
  2. Loves looking at homes, decorating, and has flipped five homes.
  3. Likes being tall.
  4. Films have helped define her vocabulary.
  5. Comes from Colorado tenement farmers with history traced to Wales.
  6. Was lost but now is found.
  7. Baking makes her happy – as does eating sweets with coffee, of course.
  8. She thinks mission work is the most important work in the world.
  9. The church started in Rome so she is learning Italian.
  10. Pam is a work in progress!

“I will be your God throughout your lifetime - until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.” Isaiah 46:4

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